Unimportant

You may be angry. Be jealous. Envy. Annoyed. Or etc. I really got what you feel. But pls, think again. I want you to imagine, how complicated to be me. One side, I don't wanna lose a best friendship I've ever had. The other side, it's hard to let someone you "love" go. And think again. You won't meet that person for 3 years. You may keep in touch but, yap, just sometimes. He can't even access internet so you two can't keep in touch regularly.

Actually, I don't pretend you to do that imagination. You aren't even the "player" in this "play". You are just someone, watching from overthere, and judging by what you see. But... please.... You never know how it feels to be me, and her. You may be my "way" to communicate with her. For sure, I don't like your way. But I try to hide it. I don't wanna be selfish because it just gives bad influence. I'm not that mean. I'm like you. An ordinary human, having feeling.

I may say "I don't have any feeling about him, don't worry please." BUT.... IT WAS SEVEN OR EIGHT OR NINE MONTHS AGO. As the time went by, who could give guarantee I wouldn't fall for him?!? Even myself, I've never imagined I would be really falling like this.

I've already apologized, and she received it. I told the truth, and she already knew. I thought, this will be end. All problems will disappear immediately. BUT WHAT I GOT?! I was just offended, and offended, and offended. Knowing the truth that there's someone else intervenes is hurt. Ya know? HURT.

Ok, I may be too selfish. Just thinking how to entertain myself. And pls, I give up. I'm tired of this endless problem. Crying can't solve any problem, girls. And I can't do it continuously. I hope you read this. Imagine how it would be, if you were me.

Right. Now what do ya want me to do? Stay away from him? Cut our communication off? Try not to keep in touch? Please think........... It's not as easy as you wonder. You may ask me to do those things. But let's imagine. Are you strong enough to receive the truth, that you'll be lostcontact with someone you adore?? And if I really cut my communication with him off, WHAT WILL YOU GET? Even if I stay away from him, I think it won't influent anything.

So once again, girls. You may hate me. You may say that I "grab" him. I'll receive. But please, I don't wanna have any "enemy". Let's forgive each other, friends. It's useless to stay in this situation. Hope you understand what I mean. Sorry for using English.

Thx for reading, sorry for spamming.

P.S: I wait for you tonight, we need to talk. WE. Just you who is envy me, and myself. No intervention from anybody else. Please. Let's solve this problem immediately.